What is Pornography Addiction?

Similar to someone with a chemical or substance addiction, porn addicts tend to replace important relationships and commitments with Internet sex or other forms of pornography. Non-Internet porn addicts can be found in places like strip clubs and adult bookstores, but it is unlikely that they have a strip club addiction or an adult bookstore addiction, rather that they have consistent and compulsive sexual problems that appear in a variety of settings.

Pornography addicts tend to isolate themselves while sexually acting out. They typically spend hours, or even days, lost in online images and experiences. Some also lose time to Internet addictions such as online fantasy games and/or gambling sites.

Nonsexual Internet addiction can also be painfully isolating, causing real life consequences for the person addicted to online gambling or fantasy games. Internet porn addiction also carries a moral stigma and the likelihood that important love and sexual relationships will be negatively affected.

While some sex and porn addicts use compulsive masturbation as a part of their actng out, others engage only minimally in the sexual act itself but nonetheless end up losing themselves to the endless sexual images and sites found online.

Some signs of pornography addiction can include:

• An inability to stop behavior(s) and pornography use, despite previous attempts to do so.
• Anger or irritability if asked to stop.
• Hiding or attempting to keep secret all of, or part, of pornography use.
• Continuing the behavior despite obvious consequences such as the deterioration of a relationship or the loss of a job.
• Getting lost in addictive behavior such as spending more time than intended online.

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Getting Better

Stopping porn addiction involves honesty and outreach. For those addicted to porn and sexually acting out, honesty begins by finding someone knowledgeable in breaking pornography addiction and admitting the entire problem to them- without omitting the embarrassing or humiliating details. Such people can be found in 12-step sexual recovery meetings and through professional organizations. Getting help with porn addiction can feel shameful, embarrassing or humiliating, but those feelings have to be tolerated when the greater concern is that the pornography addiction will significantly interfere in the life of the addict or in the lives of those they love.

Spouses of those with Internet pornography addictions also suffer, since they tend to blame themselves for the sexual addiction problem. Spouses often feel less sexually attractive and will compare their own bodies to the images the porn addict is viewing online. As there is no way that anyone could reasonably compare themselves to, or compete with online fantasy images and experiences, spouses are often left feeling trapped and alone with the problem.

Unlike alcohol or drug addiction, this issue can often feel too embarrassing or shameful for spouses to ask for help. It is difficult enough for most people to reach out for help with a private family matter, but when the problem is intensely personal, a spouse is less likely to seek help from family and friends. There are however, groups dedicated to helping spouses of porn addicts and women affected by men's addiction to porn. Similar to the 12-step programs for sex addicts, groups like S-ANON, COSA and CODA are support groups where a spouse can discuss issues and maintain his or her anonymity.

Some spouses seek all of the answers for their addicted partners, hoping that the porn addict can simply learn how to stop doing porn-addictive-behaviors and then will eventually stop. Unfortunately, addiction recovery involves more than leading a horse to water and providing the answers for them.

The sex addict involved in internet porn addiction often has to arrive at his or her own conclusion to make a change, a decision that often comes much later than their partners would like or can tolerate.

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Porn Addiction Help Tips

Below are listed a few tips for dealing with pornography addiction:

• Getting blocking software for the computer.
• Putting up inspirational pictures around the computer (kids, people you love etc.).
• Moving the computer to a public space in the home- not in a den or bedroom.
• Having an addiction prevention plan to carry out when tempted.
• Knowing the sings of porn addiction, both the general signs and those specific to you.
• Knowing the stages of porn addiction.
• Making good use of porn addiction resources like 12-step meetings, sex addiction professionals and online recovery support groups.
• Although it may seem like forever, a recovering porn addict must renew their commitment each day, one-day-at-a-time.

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